By Rob Smith
Healthy people (differentiated people) manifest (or have) many, but not necessarily all, of
the following characteristics:
- They can relate to and relax with people of all ages, races and persuasions – they are accepting.
- They can mourn after disappointments and losses and, after a time, rise up and face similar challenges again – they are resilient.
- They have done what is possible to understand their childhood and, despite past trauma, take responsibility for what they are becoming – they are responsible.
- They are humored by their own foibles and saddened by cruelty they see around them, but they do not lose hope – they are optimistic.
- They are aware of the pattern of the cycle of life and they welcome the transitions from each to each – they are growing.
- They are eager to learn about other people, relationships, life and the world – they are engaged.
- They can enter the world and the experience of another, listen, appreciate and value without passing judgment, offering advice or wanting to modify what they see – they are intimate.
- They have a few friendships of mutual vulnerability and deeper intimacy with one other person – they know others and are known.
- They are involved in mutually satisfying relationships with immediate and extended family and have a rich family of choice – they are connected.
- They are at peace more than they are unsettled, they can be calm in a crisis and can go without company when it is necessary – they are anchored.
- They live and love deeply, they learn to trust and forgive deeply – they are passionate.
- They can listen to others without speaking, and from the multiple voices around and within them, they can distinguish the voice of the sane and deliberate self – they are listeners.
- They are regularly involved in hands-on service with people less fortunate than themselves – they serve others.
- They can follow the instructions of others, when necessary, and take on tasks that benefit the community – they are followers.
- They understand leadership as a role, not as a position, so they lead when it is their function to do so – they are leaders.
- They know how much they need and do not need others and how much others do and do not need them – they are interdependent.
- They can identify their own boundaries and become aware of the power and the restrictions of these boundaries – they are self-regulating.
- They can see clearly that they have both strengths and weaknesses; yet, as much as is possible, they live from their strengths – they are empowered.
- They achieve their personal and career goals while becoming more intimate with others – they are maturing.
- They do not expect a problem-free or crises-free life, but through facing smaller problems as they occur, they equip themselves for whatever life brings – they are prepared.
- They can talk themselves down when anxious, pull themselves together when afraid, gather their internal resources when threatened – they can self-soothe.
- They can tell the truth to themselves and others – they are honest.
- They acknowledge the role and assistance of others in their journey and development – they are humble.
- They easily accept and indeed enjoy the differences in, and uniqueness, of others – they are tolerant.
- They feel neither superiority nor inferiority in relation to all other people, perceiving themselves as truly equal members of the human community – they are free of prejudice.
Originally posted 2021-12-17 13:04:53.